1. I know of a couple ways of de-carbifying pizza, but I think they all require having your own oven. (Although, the thing where you just put the toppings (tomato sauce, pizza seasoning mix, shredded mozzarella, pepperoni slices) in a glass pie pan with no crust *might* be translatable to microwave?)

3/4. \o/

5. Was this also happening before the headache started? It sounds a bit like my usual sleep-pattern-while-sick.